Friday, February 17, 2012

My Bliss {Week Number Four}

Have you ever had one of those days, or perhaps even several of them in a row, where you realize that you've allowed yourself to be negatively affected by something that you have no control over?  And then, at the moment you allow that realization in, you further realize that what has been bothering you is insignificant and unworthy of your attention? 



I had the realization regarding the insignificance of what had been keeping me in a funk for a few days yesterday afternoon, and it was such a dramatic shift in perception as to warrant being the sole focus of my reflection on bliss this week.



For a long time, I was told almost daily that I was wrong, insignificant, less than.  Though I knew intellectually that it was not true, it took a constant exercise of will and determination not to allow this verbal assault to wear me down. 

Although I would never have believed it eight years ago when I put that life behind me, the memories of that constant barrage have faded, taking with them the built in resistance.  I realized this when I began to receive cruel written taunts on my blog, starting the day that I published my How To  Build A Blog You Truly Love class post for an assignment and link up about brave blogging. 

After the initial shock of that first comment, which I immediately deleted as I have done every one since, I posted about it on the class Facebook page, and received just the support I needed to weather through the next few days of receiving and deleting comments.  But they did begin to wear me down, and I admit to being bothered by them. 

Until the shift that occurred yesterday afternoon.  It was like an infusion of light on my soul!  But that is not all of it.  What brought me to an even deeper feeling of bliss was realizing that I finally have the life I prayed for all of those years.  Not perfect, sometimes even difficult, but filled with light and love that keeps me safe from the nightmares.  I will never ask for more than that.  To me, that is everything.  That is my true bliss.



I'm linking up again today with Liv Lane and the little Bliss List linky party on her Choosing Beauty blog.  Join us!  The artwork that I've featured in this post has all been created by Liv, and is available in her Etsy shop.  It felt appropriate to share these with you today, the final day of the class that she leads and I 've been taking (and writing about!) for the last six weeks.  I am sorry to see it end, but beyond grateful for what I have learned, and for the fabulous group of women that shared the journey.  Let's keep our Facebook group the nurturing and supportive place that it has been throughout for a long time to come, ladies!  I'm grateful to all of you.  And look at that; more bliss.  I am truly blessed.

Are you feeling blessed today?  Please share; I would love to hear!

xoxo, Anita

21 comments:

  1. so sad to think that anyone would expend their
    small precious energy
    on something so destructive
    and mean-spirited
    ...what an absolutel waste of life.
    I'm grateful for the way you spread life
    and light
    and beauty
    with the days you've been given!
    You are the brave one:)
    So grateful to and for you,
    Jennifer

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  2. Beautiful post. Life is full of *Ah Ha* moments. Sometimes we don't recognize them for what they are until later. Better late than never!!! Nice to meet you. Wishing you a blissful week!

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  3. Beautiful blog post. May your soul continue to be infused with light and love.

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  4. A beautiful blog post. I think you have been brave, inspired and tenacious in the way you've handled the comments on your blog. I'm so glad to have "met" you, and look forward following your blog and your journey for a long time to come! Em ♥

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  5. Anita, beautiful heart filled post.Connecting with everyone in the BBTL course is on my bliss list too!Nancy

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  6. I am so glad that you found a way to turn around the negative. I wish I knew why the negative seems to "stick with you" more that the positive. I too am grateful for everyone I have met through BBTL and look forward to that continuing for a long time.

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  7. Congratulations on being brave and moving past the negativity. I can't imagine how difficult it must have been, to seeing those comments pop up over and over again. You are filled with the light and love you craved, and you so deserve it.

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  8. Your light is too bright for haters. Shine on!

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  9. This is my first time on your blog (thanks to Liv's blog hop). I'm in awe of how brave you are. And how blessed.

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  10. You are special, and don't ever forget it.
    Follow your light and ignor the rest.

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  11. Beautiful art, and wise words. It's hard to believe that someone will put so much energy into trying to be hurtful, when there are so many wonderful, positive activities to engage in.
    My partner and I were just discussing yesterday how we have such a happy life now that it's pointless to "get away from it all" - there's nothing to get away from. I am so very glad that you are in a similar place and that you have the strength to rise above others' insecurity, jealousy, and general negativity. Go bliss!

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  12. Hey Anita! What a beautiful, brave post! Yay for you! I don't understand "meanness" at all...and I'm SO thankful that you had your ah-hah moment and realized that that negativity is so not worth expending your thoughts and energy on...I know it's difficult when it happens...you're a beautiful person inside and out and it's been a pleasure to get to know you a bit in our class...wish it wasn't almost over...sigh...but truly a blessing, isn't it? Hugs!!!

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  13. May the rest of your day be blissful. Joy is something we all strive for and yes, your are special.

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  14. What a beautiful post! Thank you!

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  15. thank you so much for including my art here, anita. i'm so thrilled you've had this aha and were brave enough to share your journey. bliss, indeed. xoxo

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  16. I've never understood why people are mean for no reason. I also can't figure out why they troll around on blogs and boards making trouble. I'm glad you are deleting those messages. There is no troom in your life for that kind of negativity.
    Its also uplifting to know tht you got out of that toxic relationship 8 years ago. I know how it feels to fell "less than". What a wonderful feeling to know you are more.
    Your bliss is contagious.

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  17. What a great post.
    Some people are so mean inside they get a kick out of stiring trouble and causing upset. It can be difficult not to affected by their negativity. Like you, I try to focus on the good things in my life - counting my blessings.

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  18. It's nice to know we have a place where people have our backs. lovely post.

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  19. Anita:
    I read your blog because of our relationship that Ann and I have with you. People who think it's their right to rip people apart because the think their better are lower than the bottom side of rock. There is a difference between criticism and downright meanness. Ann and I know what your difficulties are over the past several years and it's so good to see that you have the strength and a vast stable of friends to help you rise above the petty problems these people with no intelligence have.
    You're the bigger and better person for it.
    Peace. A&D

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  20. I'm horrified to hear that you've been visited by the vile internet trolls. You are such a lovely, warm, creative and supportive woman it's beyond comprehension that some anonymous loser could possibly try and hurt someone as fabulous as you.
    You're fantastic, they're not, end of. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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  21. Anita ... great bliss list. And I really admire that you were able to rise above & ignore the cruel blog comments. That's one of the hardest things for me. Even if they're total strangers and you know they don't understand, or matter, it still hurts! Proud of you for rising above, and I'm glad I FINALLY stopped by your blog. xo

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Dear friends,
Thank you for taking the time to comment! ! I want this to be a space of free and open dialog, within the boundaries of respect and basic human kindness. Whether we are in agreement or not, all comments will be published so long as they meet that requirement.
xo, Anita